The Dog's Blog

‘Breaker’ Morant’ was a larger than life Australian ‘Bush Poet’. He was known, among other things, for his outstanding skills as a horseman – hence the nickname ‘Breaker’.

During the Boer war he went off to South Africa, as did many Australians, to help the ‘Mother Country’ in their dispute with the Dutch Boers. After a series of highly controversial killings – and a Courts Martial that defies all known logic and law – Morant and a colleague were shot by a British firing squad.

The incident caused diplomatic chaos between Britain and Australia and cast a very long shadow over the involvement of Lord Kitchener in the matter.

Morant’s last words were:

“Shoot straight, you bastards! Don’t make a mess of it!”

Although most of his early adventures are open to debate – it’s thought that many of the tales of his daring and dash are thought to have been started by Morant himself – there is no doubt that he was a fine horseman, a ferocious fighter and an extremely talented poet.

The name of ‘Breaker’ Morant was first brought to my attention by a superb film, made in the early 1980s, of his life in which Edward Woodward played the part of Morant.

Several years later, I was lucky enough to procure a copy of some of his reprinted poetry. My favourite has always been the last ever written by him – in his prison cell on the night before his execution. It’s called: ‘Butchered to Make a Dutchman’s Holiday’.

In prison cell I sadly sit,
A d__d crest-fallen chappie!
And own to you I feel a bit-
A little bit – unhappy!

It really ain’t the place nor time
To reel off rhyming diction -
But yet we’ll write a final rhyme
Whilst waiting cru-ci-fixion!

No matter what “end” they decide -
Quick-lime or “b’iling ile,” sir?
We’ll do our best when crucified
To finish off in style, sir!

But we bequeath a parting tip
For sound advice of such men,
Who come across in transport ship
To polish off the Dutchmen!

If you encounter any Boers
You really must not loot ‘em!
And if you wish to leave these shores,
For pity’s sake, DON’T SHOOT ‘EM!!

And if you’d earn a D.S.O.,
Why every British sinner
Should know the proper way to go
Is: “ASK THE BOER TO DINNER!”

Let’s toss a bumper down our throat, -
Before we pass to Heaven,
And toast: “The trim-set petticoat
We leave behind in Devon.”

Hmmmm…history repeating itself? (Thanks to Bev for this one)

Oliver Cromwell’s Speech on the Dissolution of the Long Parliament
Given to the House of Commons on 20 April 1653:

Read more about History and Parliament

Hot off the BBC news feed: The government has faced a massive defeat and been forced to perform a u-turn on the rights of Gurkhas to settle in this country.

Ayo Gurkhali!